Raw/Vegan Brownie Bites

1 cup cashews
1 cup medjool dates (pitted)
6 tbs cocoa or 3 tbs cacao
1 tbs pure vanilla extract

Oven Roasted Tomato Bruschetta (on focaccia)

This bruschetta is not like typical bruschetta, which is made with raw tomatoes and usually served on a more crusty bread. This bruschetta is made with "candied" tomatoes piled high on soft, toasted focaccia (substitute with whole grain bread if you like), with mozzarella and fresh basil from the garden.

It's a nice twist on the old standard. Additionally, these tomatoes would be fabulous in paninis, and for that reason I'll indicate their preparation separately from the entire dish. My grade for the bruschetta: B+

Oven Roasted Tomatoes


Several ripe Roma tomatoes, seeded and cored
Good balsamic vinegar
Good olive oil
Kosher salt
Freshly ground pepper

Take the prepared tomatoes and lay them out on a cookie sheet. Drizzle as liberally as you like with balsamic vinegar and olive oil. Add salt and pepper to taste. Bake at 300 degrees for 45 minutes to an hour.

When finished, chill and then set aside. Reserve some if you like for a jar. These last awhile in your fridge.

Oven Roasted Tomato Bruschetta (on focaccia)
One loaf store-bought focaccia (I use Trader Joe's)
Butter
Olive oil
Reserved oven roasted tomatoes (chilled)
12 - 15 leaves fresh sweet basil
Buffalo mozzarella, sliced
1 clove garlic, minced

I realize I don't have exact measurements here, and that's because I like a lot of basil and a little less mozzarella. I often omit the butter (though I like the taste it imparts). Prepare according to your proclivities.

Slice focaccia about 1/2 inch in thickness. Lay on cookie sheet and drizzle with olive oil. Add a little bit of butter to each slide if you like. Broil on hi for approximately 5 minutes. Watch closely; they toast quickly and can burn. When finished, set aside.

Grab your oven-roasted tomatoes, now chilled, and if you like, add some garlic. If they need some more balsamic, add conservatively. Slice sweet basil in long thin strips. Arrange mozzarella on top of toasted focaccia, and then add tomato mixture and basil. Serve immediately.

Delicious Caprese Paninis

Have you ever had a Caprese salad?

They're delightful, really; thickly sliced tomatoes piled with fresh buffalo mozzarella and sweet basil leaves, and drizzled, typically, with balsamic vinegar and fine olive oil. They're fabulous in the summer. I sometimes add a little salt to my Caprese salads, but not always, since fine herbs and good vinegar/oil usually does the trick.

I decided to kick my Caprese salad up a notch, making a panini sandwich out of it. I thought I'd incorporate my Easy Breezy Every Day Pesto to add some nice punch and flavor. Because it's important, I made sure that all the ingredients were as fresh as possible.

The result was something out of this world -- fresh, light and even healthy. I made mine in a waffle maker because honestly? Do you think I'm going to spend $50 for a panini maker? Hardly. A waffle maker will do just fine, and if you don't have one of those, try toasting the sandwich in a cast iron skillet, the sandwich weighed down by another heavy pan or pot. Works expertly. My grade? To the moon and beyond! A++

Delicious Caprese Paninis
Ingredients:

3 Roma tomatoes
Good balsamic vinegar
Good extra virgin olive oil
1 container buffalo mozzarella in water
15 - 20 leaves fresh sweet Basil
pesto
1 loaf sliced Italian bread (or ciabatta)
butter

Directions:
About an hour before panini making, marinate thinly sliced Roma tomatoes in balsamic vinegar and olive oil. The tomatoes will let off liquid into the oil and vinegar, creating a nice marinade.

About ten minutes before panini making, turn on waffle maker or begin to heat pan.

One hour later, arrange two bread slices for sandwich making. Slather both pieces with homemade pesto (the more the merrier, depending on how much you like the green stuff). Atop the pesto create a layer of marinated Roma tomatoes. Atop the tomatoes layer thinly sliced buffalo mozzarella. Atop the mozzarella drape the sweet basil leaves. Create sandwich, lightly buttering the outsides of both pieces of bread, and then brushing on a light layer of olive oil.

Place sandwich into waffle maker and close lid. Watch closely, making sure cheese melts and tomatoes and basil become sufficiently wilted. Pull sandwich when bread is golden brown. Cut in half and serve immediately.

Difficulty: Easy
Prep/Cook time: 30 minutes prep, 5 minutes cooking (per panini)

Spinach Salad with Gorgonzola and Orange Honey Vinaigrette

Sometimes you just can't beat a good salad. I typically subscribe to the KISS philosophy (Keep It Simple, Stupid), opting for dark greens instead of light, and less ingredients rather than more. Yes, less is more, as evidenced in this favorite of mine. All you need is fresh spinach, crumbled Gorgonzola for garnish and the following homemade dressing:

Orange Honey Vinaigrette

Ingredients:

2 cloves garlic, peeled
2 tablespoons fresh parsley, chopped
2/3 cup extra-virgin olive oil
1/3 cup balsamic vinegar
2 tablespoons orange juice
2 tablespoons honey
1/4 teaspoon dried thyme
salt and pepper, to taste

Directions:

With food processor running, drop garlic and parsley down feed tube and let process until garlic is minced.

Turn off machine and remove cover, add all remaining ingredients except salt and pepper, replace cover and process for several seconds until well blended.

Taste and add more honey if you wish, and salt and pepper to taste.

Keep bottled in the fridge and shake well before using.

My grade: A (it's now my favorite vinaigrette, hands down.)

Thanksk to Lennie from RecipeZaar for this recipe.

The best hummus, tabbouleh and tzatziki you'll ever put in your mouth

This week we're being vegetarians.

I personally am doing this for spiritual reasons; the rest of my family, however, is doing it because I have to do it. Not to make it sound harsh or draconian; it's actually been pretty lovely eating this way. Vegetarian food doesn't have to suck, come to find out. In fact it can really be great, especially with recipes I'll be giving you today.

My husband loves hummus. I always thought it looked a bit like toddler poop and so was never really game to eat it. Until about four years ago, when I finally tried it slathered on pita bread and topped with tzatziki and tabbouleh which my husband insisted I try. Now, you won't hear me admitting this often, but my husband? He's been absolutely right, all along!

Here are three recipes for these dishes that are both easy and delish. They'd be great as an appetizer, but we enjoy them for dinner and no one is left unsatisfied. Enjoy! My grade: A+

Easy and Delicious Hummus (Hummous) (as adapted from Fine Cooking Magazine)

Ingredients:

2 16 oz cans chick peas (garbanzo beans)
3 cloves garlic, minced
2 tablespoons tahini
2 tablespoons fresh squeezed lemon juice
1/2 teaspoon ground cumin
1/4th cup olive oil
1/2 - 1 teaspoon Kosher salt

Directions

Add all ingredients into food processor and puree. I'm serious. It's that easy. Add more or less oil to get the consistency you prefer. If you don't want to use too much oil, warm water works well, too. Always taste during the process so the spices are just right. You can add olive oil and additional lemon juice on top of the hummus upon serving. I usually just do the oil, though, because the lemon used is adequate.

For a nice variation, add sun-dried tomatoes and/or roasted garlic.

Tabbouleh (as adapted from The Essential Vegetarian Cookbook by Diana Shaw)

Ingredients:

1 cup bulgur wheat
1 1/2 cup water, boiled
2 teaspoons fresh lemon juice
1 cucumber, seeded, chopped
1/2 cup parsley, minced
2 tablespoons fresh mint, minced
2 scallions, minced, white part only (I also use shallots)
1 1/2 tablespoons olive oil
1 medium tomato, chopped
2 cloves garlic, minced
Kosher salt to taste

Directions:

Bring water to a boil. Add bulgur wheat and remove from heat. Let sit for a 1/2 - 1 hour. In this time the bulgur wheat will soak up the water, enlarging. At the end of allotted time drain bulgur through sieve, making sure to remove all water. Transfer to bowl.

To bulgur wheat add add chopped cucumber and tomato, parsley, garlic, mint, olive oil and lemon juice, mixing thoroughly. Serve room temperature or refrigerate up to 3 hours.

Tzatziki (Cucumber-Yogurt Dip) (as adapted from Fine Cooking Magazine)

1 1/2 cups plain whole milk yogurt (I like Greek)
1 cucumber, seeded, diced
1 tablespoon red wine vinegar
2 teaspoons minced fresh mint
2 teaspoons minced fresh dill
2 teaspoons extra virgin olive oil
3 cloves garlic
Kosher salt to taste
Fresh mint for garnish

Mix yogurt, salt and garlic. Add to this the diced cucumber (making sure to drain all excess water from cucumber), vinegar, mint, dill and olive oil. Stir to blend and season with more salt if needed. Cover and chill for at least 4 hours before serving.


Serve all three on whole grain pita bread. I like to layer first with the hummus and then atop that add razor-thin slices of cucumber and tomato. Atop that I add the tzatziki and then tabbouleh. Brilliant!

Difficulty: Easy
Serves: 4 people well

Delicious Fresh Garden Soup

Even though it's kind of hot this time of year (kind of?), a good soup is always welcome in my house. 


If you're a nutritarian (or vegan, or vegetarian), you already know that soups are a mainstay. (Typically, when adhering to the plan 100%, a person will have a smoothie in the morning, a salad in the afternoon and soup at night -- so soups are important.)

Our garden is starting to explode, so it seemed like a good a time to harvest some vegetables for a fresh garden soup. If you have a garden just about any vegetable will do, from broccoli to kale to spinach to carrots. Be creative! Vegetables are good for you.

I'm going to tell you right now: this soup is delicious.

Keep in mind that not everyone in the house is nutritarian. It didn't matter; everyone who tried the soup loved it. Try it and tell me what you think!

Ingredients:

4 quarts of water
2 T Better Than Bouillon (or less or more, according to your salt tastes) (another vegan alternative is Not-Chick'n Bouillon Cubes --- use 1 or 2)
2 heaping T organic tomato paste (no salt added)
1 15 oz can organic diced tomatoes, or tomatoes from your garden
3 carrots, chopped
1 cup broccoli florets
1/2 a white onion, chopped
6 - 8 cloves of garlic, minced and left out for 45 minutes before use in soup**
2 cups spinach, cut or chopped
2 cups kale, cut or chopped
1 cup corn
1/2 cup black rice
1 15 oz can kidney beans
1 15 oz can pinto or black beans (really, any beans you love)
1.5 cups Bob's Red Mill Vegi Soup Mix (contains green and yellow split peas, barley, lentils and vegetable pasta)

Directions:

Add 4 quarts of water to pot and set to boil.

After all fresh vegetables are chopped, add to water, along with all beans, diced tomato, tomato paste and bouillon. Do not salt. Do not add garlic at this time. Once at a rolling boil for fifteen minutes, reduce heat to simmer (though not too low).

Cook this mixture approximately 1 to 1.5 hours. Once vegetables are cooked, add Vegi Soup Mix. You might like to bring up the heat on the stove if you've had it low, to aid in the cooking of the mix.

Wait an hour and then add rice and cook one more hour.

At the beginning of last hour of cooking, dice garlic and let sit for 45 minutes.** After this time add to soup and let cook for 15 - 20 minutes, or until soft.

This makes a thick, hearty soup. Some might like to add more water according to their desired consistency. Serve this soup alone or along side a spring salad or whole grain bread of your choice.

It really is amazing!

**A report by Science Daily explains that if raw garlic is first chopped and then allowed to sit for 45 minutes, it can produce allicin. Once allicin is produced by this raw garlic preparaton, the garlic can be cooked with minimal loss of allicin. According to this report, cooked garlic prepared in this manner is similar in its anti-cancer effects to raw garlic. Source 

Texas, you're doing it wrong

There's something very wrong in Texas. Namely, there's hardly any produce of merit. 

Which is odd because people farm there. All over there, and all kinds of crops, too.

Still, walk into any store in Aubrey or Denton and/or a neighboring town and you will be hard pressed to find a decent and diverse produce section at the market, much less a truly healthy restaurant at which to dine. (I realize that Denton is a college town and therefore there are some vegetarian options -- I heartily endorse this. It is not, however, the norm for the area.)

I was good enough to remember to pack healthy food the day of the trip. Hummus with vegetables on a whole wheat wrap, water, fruit. But that lasted only a day. Once in Texas and after eating the mobile stores, well, I got hungry again. And went out to eat with the family. 


Honestly, and I'm not trying to be elitist --- I was downright shocked. The first restaurant we went to was much like them all, for the most part, with everything fried beyond recognition, battered, buttered, butchered. Inevitably I began getting sick the second day I was there and was in fact sick for the duration of my entire stay. From family meals replete with fried catfish and hushpuppies, to sauce-soaked barbecue and sides of chips and cookies, the parade of bad food never stopped. Water was eschewed for an abundance of sweet tea and soda; what salad there was, was served from a bag and was hard, old and covered in ranch.


When did we forget how to eat? When did we start thinking that chips were better than salads, cookies preferable to whole grains? When did we stop caring about health, stamina, energy, vitality, nutrition and weight? It all seems so unconscious to me, so much eating because it's what we've been eating forever, as opposed to mindful consumption of the foods most likely to improve our health, happiness and life. Apparently the practice of eating well and eating often is a lost philosophy. We need to resurrect it.


People don't want to eat healthfully because by this point they don't like the way real food tastes. They think beans are bland, herbs are weird and fruits are boring. Chips, cookies, battered and fried foods, sugars, fats and processed foods --- these are what people want to eat because it's what they grew up on. That doesn't make it okay and nobody has an excuse anymore. The information is out there. If you're living your life eating this way you are harming yourself. If you do not do whatever it takes to reacquaint yourself with whole, healthy and real foods, you are not only being a bad example, you are shortening your life and quite possibly your family's as well. 


There simply shouldn't be more obese young people walking down the street (hi Amarillo) than fit and healthy ones. Steak should not be the norm but the occasional center of a meal, if that. Vegetables should be at the fore, as well as fruits, seeds, nuts and beans. Period. 


Any other diet is just plain wrong. That's blunt but it's true. If you're eating the way Texas is eating, or most of America is eating, you're not eating right. And you've got to do better.


It's never too late to start. Need to know how to begin?

Meet Dr. Furhman.

Harvest time

Such a satisfying day.

There's nothing quite like being hungry --- really hungry --- and then foraging through the garden you built and grew yourself. Harvesting all manner of vegetables: radishes, tomato, lettuces, spinach, basil, peppers.  Washing them, cutting them, preparing a beautiful, delicious meal for your family, one that is organic, free of pesticides and full of fresh life force. Delicious!

From root: 

To table: 

(With the addition of organic strawberries, raw nuts and raw bleu cheese-- sigh!)

Eating nutritarian is delicious! You can eat all you want of fruits, vegetables, nuts and seeds, along with some grains. Things you can grow with your own hands; things you can make without additives and extras. Good, clean food for your whole family.

Not that hard.

Gardening For Health

We installed our new garden.

It was our thought that we should grow as much food for ourselves as we possibly could. I've tried my hand at gardening in the past with mixed results. Results were mixed mainly because there were times I was really into the garden and other times I was non-committal or downright negligent. I didn't have a sense then just how nutritious and satisfying growing food for my kitchen table could be.

These days, with things like genetic modification and rampant use of chemicals and pesticides, it is comforting knowing first-hand the real quality of your lettuce or carrots. Growing your own food also cuts into a great deal of your grocery bill, which of course never hurts.

We decided to loosely follow the tenets of square foot gardening. My partner, handy as he is, was able to effortlessly construct a 4 x 8 raised bed. But this was only our first bed. After planting things like chili peppers, herbs, tomatoes, lettuce and the like, we got the bug for more. He constructed another bed, 4 x 4, and then pulled some untreated wooden boxes from the sheds for use as planters.  We also re-purposed a couple of unused trash cans for potatoes.

It still wasn't enough. He constructed another 4 x 16 bed and pulled out more planters and items for re-purposing from his sheds (things like bookshelves and cabinets). We utilized all of these, planting, in addition to our first bed, the following items:

broccoli
strawberries
Brussels sprouts
leeks
sunflowers
blueberries
red onions
bib lettuce
salad greens
spinach
more tomatoes
and then even more tomatoes
salvia
artichokes
carrots
radishes
all manner of squash
watermelon
a GIANT pumpkin
sweet bell peppers (red, yellow, orange)
...and so much more.

The end result looks like this:

Just look at all the re-purposed items:

Seriously, we used left over wood, makeshift trellises, trashcans, discarded shelves, forgotten planters and a lot more. What we created was a wonderful little urban garden that has the potential -- should we care for it -- to produce a lot of wonderful food. 

Me, I'm looking forward to all the greens. Kohlrabi, kale, arugula, chard ... there's a lot. A good amount of cruciferous vegetables, too, because they are so incredibly nutritious and wonderful for you. We have fruit trees on the land, as well: things like peaches, plums and apples, and I have lots of yummy plans for those. 

Anybody can garden, even apartment dwellers. It really does give you an immense measure of satisfaction when you plant a garden, tend it, watch it grow and harvest. 

I'll keep you posted on the progress of this year's summer gardens. 

Eating Raw While Cabin-Camping

I'm going away on a one-week camping trip (not full camping, but camping-with-cabins-and-showers, which I much prefer) and am trying to figure out what I will eat. There will be a community refrigerator (yay!) and perhaps a stove or oven, as well, which I will not need, except for tea -- which would be nice.

I'm not sure I can maintain 70-90% raw while I am away; I think I will have to depend on some cereals and foods like tortillas, hummus and the like. I think I'll probably be eating more like 50% raw, sticking to only those fruits and vegetables that will keep for a week. Things like:

apples
bananas (probably less than a week)
nectarines/peaches
broccoli
some lettuces/spinach
cabbage
avocado
onion
tomatoes (probably less than a week)
sprouts

I'll also include raw dehydrated fruits as well as nuts and seeds, a staple in any raw diet.

This week camping will potentially involve something like...hunger. This might be good for me, probably, as I've been too liberal with myself for the last one or two months due to moving and the rehabbing of a new house. In truth my raw percentage numbers have been pitifully low. This is evidenced rather predictably in frequent gastro-intestinal distress: the only time I am ever, ever regular or comfortable is when I eat raw. If I do not eat raw I either have a hard time going to the bathroom at all, or else get sick after every meal. Needless to say, it's a real drag.

My meals will consist of organic cereals and rice milk in the morning, raw fruit (dehydrated and otherwise), nuts and seeds during the day, and hummus-and-veggie wraps in the evening. I might include some raw cheese in the wraps just for excitement.

I'll check in after the trip to report back on how I did.

McDonald's is not the temple to which I am referring

Today I recovered.

I wanted to throw up all day. Talk about misery. I am perpetually amazed at my body's lack of tolerance for all the food American's typically eat. My body beat me up over my recent bad choices. And I get it, I really do.

Did I even eat today? I'm trying to think. Jesus, I'm not even sure. Wait, I think there was a banana, and I know I supplemented (including coconut oil and enzymes). That's really all I could keep down. The rest of the time it was lukewarm water (the best way to drink it, I'm sorry to inform you) with lemon. I did have coffee, insomuch as I paid five whole dollars for one cup of it, then had to throw the whole thing away because as I sipped I almost vomited it right back into the cup. I know you love reading this, and honestly? It's for your own good. If you're eating that way, you're treating yourselves terribly!

The body acclimates to wellness. The body in fact loves to be well and seeks physical attunement and wellness and health in general. And so when we allow the body to be well and to achieve balance, and if we then maintain this balance for a significant amount of time, the body literally forgets what it is like to be out of balance. It comes to rely upon the fine way we have been treating it.

Until of course, one fateful weekend where bars and friends and Metallica cover bands converge, when you find yourself drinking unnecessary amounts of liquor and ingesting whole piles of grease laden french fries. And then the body suddenly forgets all the wonderful things you've done for it and becomes punitive, seemingly wanting to hurt you. And so it does.

Aspire to 80% raw, I am telling you. Stop drinking carbonated drinks, too, because they kill your insides and deplete your bones. Drink water: half your body weight in ounces is a good place to start, and tea and other beverages do count toward your total water intake. Also please throw out your iceberg lettuce, because its nutritional value pales in comparison to other, far superior greens, such as romaine and even better, spinach. Spinach will improve your eyesight, provide vital vitamins and minerals and much, much more. Throw raw seeds and nuts into the spinach just for crunch and pleasure. Dress it with a nice olive oil and balsamic mix, super easy to make, adding a little honey (which happens to be a superfood, not unlike the spinach and nuts) and some orange juice. This makes for a delightful meal, and is chock filled with zinc and b vitamins.

And please, I beg of you, stop eating at McDonald's (or any other fast food place). McDonald's is simply swill dressed up as "food". It is worse than dog food actually, and also addictive. How many times do you put that stuff into your bodies? Truthfully? 

STOP IT.

Instead eat whole foods that actually occur in nature. For example Nutri-grain bars do not actually grow on trees. Nor do Fritos. These things are processed in plants where people probably sneeze right onto them or else wipe fecal-matter-hands all over the things they are handling.

Make the promise today that you will only eat whole and natural foods, in the most clean and organic state possible. And then just do it.

YOUR BODY IS YOUR TEMPLE.

Hard Things

It's been a little while since I've posted on this blog. Since last you heard from me I got divorced, moved from Chicago to Denver, entered and left a relationship and just entered a new relationship with, I daresay, the love of my life.

It's been a long road but I am happy. Wiser to be sure, but confident now that I can do the Hard Things, as I've done so many of them already.

How's my eating? Lackluster. Do I still struggle with my eating disorder? Yes, and I do believe I always will. But I'm dealing with it, in therapy and in my own day to day life. I'm writing a book about spiritual nutrition and still believe strongly in the raw way of life, for the most part. I also believe in having fun, which means cocktails, hot chocolate, cake and some barbecue. It's about not being crazy.
It's about moderation.

I'm better. Well. Sleeping and healthy.

I'm happy.

Five Nutritarian Meals That Taste Good

Nutritarian Meals

1. Vegetable wrap -- Whole grain tortilla with homemade bean paste or hummus, avocado, tomato, dark greens, onion, mushroom, feta/bleu cheese
(substitute wrap with sprouted grain bread or sprouted pita)

2.  Vegetable barley/lentil soup -- homemade vegetable stock, garlic, onion, mushroom, spinach, beans, lentils/barley, black rice

3. oatmeal -- steel cut oats, almond/coconut milk, chia/flax (or both), cinnamon, vanilla, raw honey, raw nuts, fruit of choice, coconut oil

4. hummus -- homemade hummus, vegetables such as cucumber, celery and carrots with which to eat, or whole grain/sprouted grain pita, toasted bread sticks (sprouted)

5. fruit smoothie -- organic frozen fruit, high quality Greek yogurt, raw honey, coconut oil

Insomnia is full of suck

Easy Veggie & Hummus Sandwich

Remember that raw hummus recipe from yesterday? I hope so, since it was only yesterday.

ANYWAY, here's me using that hummus in a easy-breezy veggie sandwich why btw? Totally tasted awesome. I had to make seconds for everybody which is kind of amazing when you realize that it was HEALTHY.

Summer Garden

The sunshine does wonders for me.

I dropped the top and drove around all day, ultimately landing at the garden store. Produce is ridonkulously expensive these days and I prefer to grow my own anyway, where I can. This midwest soil is bananas-good. And so I went and picked up my flats of Roma tomatoes, my sweet basil, my spinach, my (one, for the love of God) cucumber. I'll plant them tomorrow and within weeks will be eating my own harvest. I have to say, there's very little quite so satisfying. I make my own hummus and garnish it with my own cucumbers and tomatoes. I make mounds of bruschetta. I use the basil and Roma tomatoes, add mozzarella and then make tasty paninis . The spinach is new this year (I failed miserably with it last year) and if any of you know me, you know how I love spinach salads. So it's good. It feels and tastes very good.

Sunshine? Also good. You out there reading this? Probably totally vitamin D deficient. Don't feel bad because most of us are. But vitamin D acts as a well-being hormone within us; it actually has the ability to make us feel better, lighter, calmer. Vitamin D deficiency has also been linked to a variety of maladies/conditions. So get your fifteen minutes, people, or supplement if you need to. And eat those veggies. And eat that fruit!

Meanwhile I'll take pictures of my garden and the things I make with my harvest.

Stay tuned.

Each pound, a pound of flesh

I am down nearly ten pounds since this time last month.

It happened pretty quickly, actually, coinciding with a family member's release from the hospital (into my care) as well as the quickly intensifying chaos of my life. Again, and to reiterate, when I feel my life circumstances spinning out of control (i.e., I cannot make it better for my loved one, I cannot stop the inevitable change barreling toward my head) I take it out on my body. And it's not really "taking it out" so much as it is "taking control." My body becomes one of the only things I can control, and this in the form of what I put into my mouth (or do not), how much I move (or do not) or how often I nourish myself.

It's a delicate and ugly dance. Overriding logic forces me to make good choices when I concede to make choices at all. Good choices usually involve lots of vegetables, some fruit and a few lean proteins. It's just that there aren't a lot of them. Choices, that is. Eating, in particular.

I lost five pounds on raw, when I tried it. Since then I've incorporated the raw idea into my meal plans but have not focused on raw so much as whole foods. Good foods. Yet I did lose five pounds eating raw, even when I was stuffing myself with all that good food. And so even eating in that way (something I perceive as quite good for myself), I couldn't keep my weight steady or on. Add stress to that and here I am, I suppose, ten pounds down.

I think ultimately the structure and stricture of eating raw is very, very good for me, because it mimics the control exercised vis-a-vis my eating disorder while still nourishing my body. Having said that, I would give much in order to not need to control anything. To accept life as it is and myself as I am.

That is the work, I guess.

For more information on the truth about eating disorders, please read this article by Carolyn Friedman. I've read through it myself, and while I'd potentially put more emphasis on the media playing a pivotal role in the exacerbation of these diseases, I found it to be extremely insightful and helpful.

Ascending To Someplace

Why yes, I have been off the grid. A family member was diagnosed with a problem and then had to have that problem excised clear from their body. This after what can only be called the detonation of my entire life, which, by the way, I am grateful for. Gratitude is essential to life.

Before going into the hospital this family member said that irrespective of the rubble that is my life, I seem happier now than ever. This is true. I am happy because I have been liberated from things. I don't mean people or even circumstances --- I have been liberated in my mind from preconceived notions of what ought to be. Who I am. I am precisely as I present in this moment and I am fine with that. Sure, I seek to better myself or ascend, but right now beneath blankets and at the very first flash of dawn, I feel better already. I have ascended to someplace, some wonderfully neutral place, and I am grateful.

Breakfast:
Fruit smoothie, emphasis on blueberries.

Lunch:
Vegetable sandwich on sprouted grain bread: romas, cucumbers, spinach, hummus.

Dinner:
Salad: spinach, bleu cheese, raw pecans, dressed with cold pressed EVOO, balsamic and agave nectar.

High Blood Pressure Is Bumming Me Out

Natural Skin Care Tips

The Magnesium Cure

The Importance of Magnesium/Symptoms of Deficiency

Natural Calm Products

Magnesium Oil by Sunfood.com

Nutritious --- and YUMMY! --- smoothie recipe

Why having an eating disorder led me to raw/nutritarian

Raw food challenge recap

Eat Better

Life's unreasonably tough right now. This is okay; I'm not complaining. It's just hard. I'm really just here to opine on how stress affects my eating. Because it does. Insofar as I don't do much of it. Eating, that is.

I actually feel nauseous a lot. This could have something to do with my basic health; my immune system is not what it should be, as usual. But when you're nauseous you don't much want to eat a bowl of fruit, or anything for that matter. I guess I could stomach some rice but I don't feel motivated or well enough to make it.

Although I don't careen about the world all stressed out, I do think it gets to me in other ways, and this is one way. Food becomes secondary, I don't want to watch shows with beautiful people, I don't want to talk to anyone about anything. I just want to stay in bed and watch Oprah. (This implies Oprah is not beautiful, which is in fact not the case.) Which I obviously cannot do. I have to force myself out of these sweats and go out and buy some food, get a prescription, get something to eat. Just being outside should help.

My friend is coming next week. There will be much culinary debauchery -- I am looking forward to this. I know at the very least she'll make me eat, and I'll be happy to, largely because I'll be happy.

I don't think I'm depressed. I'm just inundated. I want to focus on all the sunshiney aspects of the food I ought to be eating, but it's hard to even acknowledge the sunshine. Last night I had to set boundaries with two people and ended up in tears, bereft, poured out. It's all too much is how it seems. But I'll be all right. I honestly just need a plan. Baby steps to the elevator.

First order of business in reference to this plan: eat better.

Still plugging along -- to the best of my ability

I went away this Labor Day and found out first hand how difficult it is finding ways to eat raw in a cooked world. I couldn't manage it hardly at all, and after becoming so sick after even the smallest (S.A.D.*) meals, I started to stop eating altogether. Seems the body acclimates quite quickly to the raw lifestyle, which is good on a lot of levels, just not when you're forced to transition to another way of eating. Alas. How to go from sixty to zero in just one day!

Am back on raw now, thank God. Fruits, nuts and more fruit. Due to some surgery today (local anesthetic) I'm a bit less-than-motivated to go rummaging for food, but hopefully I ultimately make a healthy choice. It's kind of hard caring about things when you're on narcotics which make you want to hug everybody.

In any event, I will definitely continue with the raw way of life. It'll be curious to see what percentage I ultimately reach and sustain. Irrespective, I know it's a great thing for me right now; it makes me feel good -- like I'm doing something wonderful for my body. Which I am. More fruits, veggies, nuts and seeds never hurt anybody!

*standard American diet

Let's just break it down

Quick Weight Loss With Raw

Day 12 on Raw: Lose Weight Fast

Day 10 Eating Raw Ya'all

Day 8 Raw

The last three days have been quite hard. Life gets in the way sometimes and mucks up all your great plans. That's okay though. We've got to allow for those things, and then we've got to be able to pick ourselves up and keep moving. I really do think if we can manage that, we're doing all right.

Day 5 Raw

Blueberry Chocolate Smoothie

I made a delicious smoothie today. The base was organic, unfiltered blueberry juice, to which I added frozen pineapple and blueberries and a banana. Yum. A smoothie would be perfect just like that, but no...I then added a heaping teaspoon of organic cacao powder (sooooo good for you) and a teaspoon of raw honey (ditto). The end result was a chocolate-blueberry smoothie, delightfully tasting and truly healthy.

What a great way to start the morning! Next time I make it, I'll take a picture and note the amounts so I can include it here as a recipe. Though it's really about eyeballing it and adjusting to your personal tastes.

I also think I'll substitute the blueberry juice base with something like almond milk, which should make the smoothie more creamy, like a shake.

Day 4 Raw Ya'all

Had some really cool conversations today with people who are on their own nutritional journey. I've thought a lot about why eating raw actually feels like a spiritual thing -- and I think I begin to touch upon this reason toward the end of the following video. Loving our body and treating it well has everything to do with love in general, love as a discipline. I do think we need to love ourselves actively; in doing so we are able to love others more fully.

And what the world needs now? Is love, sweet love!

Day 3 Raw Ya'all